Small Town or 7th Circle of Hell?

I grew up in a town of roughly 20K people. We used to joke that there were 3 families that lived there and they basically continued to breed amongst themselves. Seriously, everyone in the town had one of three last names. If they didn't have one of those last names, they were a cousin of those people. This is not an exaggeration.

There has to be something in the water. The whole place breeds unusually attractive men. Unfortunately these men are dumb as rocks, but nonetheless hot. (In college we had a name for those boys. It's not nice enough to put in writing...even for this blog).

The town broadcasts the local beauty pageant on public access television. All the girls have "a talent" but unfortunately they don't have any "talent". This is the same public access channel that produced the non-Emmy award winning show, Telemart that I mentioned here. Do you think they forced them to wear those colors or was that voluntary? Which brings me to the next item...

Despite the fact that this place is only about 30 miles west of Philadelphia somehow bad taste mutates and proliferates. I couldn't quite get the camera out fast enough to catch this one from the front, but I think you get the picture... The acid wash, fade from light to dark is awesome in it's hideousness. There were also a plethora of short shorts on fattie fats. Those were usually strategically paired with really tight tank tops (spaghetti straps mandatory).

People also have an obsession with their cars and the speakers in those cars. If the speakers are loud enough to rupture eardrums and make small children cry then it's considered a good start. This might explain why this was part of the parade...

These are the same people that you see hanging out at the car wash on a Saturday night. What on earth do you do at a car wash?

What a silly question...the car wash is where you drink your 40 of Old E, with your cousins, in your acid washed jeans.... duh.