Husband & I took the kiddo the ER this evening upon the direction of the on call nurse at her ped's office. In addition to spiking a fever of almost 105, she had shallow breathing and a wicked phlegmy cough. Presumably fearing some nasty RSV or flu, we were advised to hit the ER.
Upon arriving one of us had to take her to the room and one of us had to check her in. She wouldn't let anyone but me hold her, so the choice was made for us. Eventually he joins us and the following transpires:
Me: Sorry about that, I actually sort of wanted you to take her back because you can talk to these people (you know that being a doctor and all).
Him: Oh I wanted you to go because you know more about her.......Oh wait, I forgot you freak out in hospitals and forget to tell them anything.
Me: I didn't forget to tell them anything.
Him: Ummm, you didn't tell them about the rash and you didn't tell them she had an eye infection this past week.
Me: Oh yea. That's right, I am bad in hospitals.
After seeing about 342 medical personnel, someone comes in to take a look at a diaper rash that the first nurse had declared "just normal contact dermatitis".
342nd Medical Personnel: Oh that's a textbook fungal infection.
Me: Ok, we just actually bought some anti fungal stuff just in case, so we'll start using that.
342nd Medical Personnel Leaves
Me: (poke husband)
Him: What was that for?
Me: I asked you if that was fungal and you said no.
Him: How would I know I'm a Psychiatrist.
Me: Oh suuuure, you're "just a Psychiatrist" when it's convenient.
Him: Umm yea, I really don't really see too many pediatric vaginas in my line of work.
Me: Oh, right. I guess not.
Several thousand dollars later we were released with instructions to pump her full of liquids and Tylenol and slather fungal cream on the nether bits.